FREE SHIPPING ON ALL CANDLES - ENDS MONDAY
MENU BUTTON
MENU BUTTON
CART BUTTON
0
shop
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
YOU HELPLESS MOUTHBREATHERS NEED US TO HOLD YOUR HAND AND CHANGE YOUR FUCKING DIAPER?

HOW BIG ARE THEY?

FUCKING HUGE. THERE'S ONE POUND OF WAX IN EACH CANDLE, PACKED IN TIGHT LIKE A DICK IN YOUR BUTT. IMAGINE A DINOSAUR COCK (TRY NOT TO CUM IN YOUR PANTS IF YOU'RE A FURRY). IT'S BIGGER THAN THAT.

ARE THEY SKIN SAFE?

WE DO NOT RECOMMEND POURING THE HOT WAX ON YOURSELF OR OTHER PEOPLE. THIS INCLUDES YOUR NIPPLES, DICKLIPS, PUSSY, BALLS, ASSHOLE, BETWEEN YOUR PUSSY FOLDS, IN YOUR MOUTH, OR ANYWHERE ELSE.

WHY DO I NEED THESE?

EVERYONE HAS SMELLS THEY DON'T WANT PEOPLE SMELLING. MAYBE YOU'RE A DIRTY LITTLE STONER FUCK WHO SMOKES WEED ALL DAY. MAYBE YOU SPENT ALL NIGHT EATING A SLOPPY PUSSY OR SUCKING ON A BIG, GREASY COCK. NO ONE WANTS TO SMELL THAT SHIT. BUY THE FUCKING CANDLE.

HOW ARE THEY SHIPPED?

EVERY ORDER IS SHIPPED IN A SHITTY, CHEAP CARDBOARD BOX. WE TAPE THE LIVING FUCK OUT OF IT AND WRAP THE LITTLE CUNT IN A DICKLOAD OF BUBBLE WRAP.

CAN I RETURN MY ORDER?

NOPE. DUMB FUCKING QUESTION. IF YOU DON'T LIKE YOUR PURCHASE THEN YOU CAN JUST GO FUCK YOURSELF. YOU DON'T DESERVE THE CANDLE OR THE MONEY YOU SPENT ON IT. GO EAT A BOWL OF MELTY DOG SHIT.

DO I DESERVE THESE CANDLES?

NO. BUT YOU CAN BUY ONE ANYWAYS.

HOW DO I KNOW THESE CANDLES ARE AS GOOD AS YOU SAY THEY ARE?

YOU WON'T KNOW UNLESS YOU BUY ONE. TAKE A CHANCE FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE YOU FUCKING COWARD.

DECENT CANDLES
3564 AVALON PARK E BLVD SUITE 1 PMB 2025
ORLANDO, FL 32828
insta
facebook
twitter
tiktok